20 Cognitive Distortions and How They Affect Your Life

Originally posted on GoodTherapy.org on April 7, 2015 by GoodTherapy Staff

Our circumstances don’t define us. Regardless of what happens in life, we always have the power to choose our attitude. So what’s the difference between someone who remains hopeful despite experiencing great suffering and the person who stubs his or her toe and remains angry the rest of the day? The answer lies in the person’s thinking patterns.

Psychologists use the term “cognitive distortions” to describe irrational, inflated thoughts or beliefs that distort a person’s perception of reality, usually in a negative way. Cognitive distortions are common but can be hard to recognize if you don’t know what to look for. Many occur as automatic thoughts. They are so habitual that the thinker often doesn’t realize he or she has the power to change them. Many grow to believe that’s just the way things are.

Cognitive distortions can take a serious toll on one’s mental health, leading to increased stress, depression, and anxiety. If left unchecked, these automatic thought patterns can become entrenched and may negatively influence the rational, logical way you make decisions.

For those looking to improve their mental health by recognizing pesky cognitive distortions, we’ve compiled a list of 20 common ones that may already be distorting your perception of reality:

1. BLACK-AND-WHITE THINKING

A person with this dichotomous thinking pattern typically sees things in terms of either/or. Something is either good or bad, right or wrong, all or nothing. Black-and-white thinking fails to acknowledge that there are almost always several shades of gray that exist between black and white. By seeing only two possible sides or outcomes to something, a person ignores the middle—and possibly more reasonable—ground.

2. PERSONALIZATION

When engaging in this type of thinking, an individual tends to take things personally. He or she may attribute things that other people do as the result of his or her own actions or behaviors. This type of thinking also causes a person to blame himself or herself for external circumstances outside the person’s control.

3. ‘SHOULD’ STATEMENTS

Thoughts that include “should,” “ought,” or “must” are almost always related to a cognitive distortion. For example: “I should have arrived to the meeting earlier,” or, “I must lose weight to be more attractive.” This type of thinking may induce feelings of guilt or shame. “Should” statements also are common when referring to others in our lives. These thoughts may go something like, “He should have called me earlier,” or, “She ought to thank me for all the help I’ve given her.” Such thoughts can lead a person to feel frustration, anger, and bitterness when others fail to meet unrealistic expectations. No matter how hard we wish to sometimes, we cannot control the behavior of another, so thinking about what others should do serves no healthy purpose.

4. CATASTROPHIZING

This occurs when a person sees any unpleasant occurrence as the worst possible outcome. A person who is catastrophizing might fail an exam and immediately think he or she has likely failed the entire course. A person may not have even taken the exam yet and already believe he or she will fail—assuming the worst, or preemptively catastrophizing.

5. MAGNIFYING

With this type of cognitive distortion, things are exaggerated or blown out of proportion, though not quite to the extent of catastrophizing. It is the real-life version of the old saying, “Making a mountain out of a molehill.”

6. MINIMIZING

The same person who experiences the magnifying distortion may minimize positive events. These distortions sometimes occur in conjunction with each other. A person who distorts reality by minimizing may think something like, “Yes, I got a raise, but it wasn’t very big and I’m still not very good at my job.”

7. MINDREADING

This type of thinker may assume the role of psychic and may think he or she knows what someone else thinks or feels. The person may think he or she knows what another person thinks despite no external confirmation that his or her assumption is true.

8. FORTUNE TELLING

A fortune-telling-type thinker tends to predict the future, and usually foresees a negative outcome. Such a thinker arbitrarily predicts that things will turn out poorly. Before a concert or movie, you might hear him or her say, “I just know that all the tickets will be sold out when we get there.”

9. OVERGENERALIZATION

When overgeneralizing, a person may come to a conclusion based on one or two single events, despite the fact reality is too complex to make such generalizations. If a friend misses a lunch date, this doesn’t mean he or she will always fail to keep commitments. Overgeneralizing statements often include the words “always,” “never,” “every,” or “all.”

10. DISCOUNTING THE POSITIVE

This extreme form of all-or-nothing thinking occurs when a person discounts positive information about a performance, event, or experience and sees only negative aspects. A person engaging in this type of distortion might disregard any compliments or positive reinforcement he or she receives.

11. FILTERING

This cognitive distortion, similar to discounting the positive, occurs when a person filters out information, negative or positive. For example, a person may look at his or her feedback on an assignment in school or at work and exclude positive notes to focus on one critical comment.

12. LABELING

This distortion, a more severe type of overgeneralization, occurs when a person labels someone or something based on one experience or event. Instead of believing that he or she made a mistake, people engaging in this type of thinking might automatically label themselves as failures.

13. BLAMING

This is the opposite of personalization. Instead of seeing everything as your fault, all blame is put on someone or something else.

14. EMOTIONAL REASONING

Mistaking one’s feelings for reality is emotional reasoning. If this type of thinker feels scared, there must be real danger. If this type of thinker feels stupid, then to him or her this must be true. This type of thinking can be severe and may manifest as obsessive compulsion. For example, a person may feel dirty even though he or she has showered twice within the past hour.

15. ALWAYS BEING ‘RIGHT’

This thinking pattern causes a person to internalize his or her opinions as facts and fails to consider the feelings of the other person in a debate or discussion. This cognitive distortion can make it difficult to form and sustain healthy relationships.

16. SELF-SERVING BIAS

A person experiencing self-serving bias may attribute all positive events to his or her personal character while seeing any negative events as outside of his or her control. This pattern of thinking may cause a person to refuse to admit mistakes or flaws and to live in a distorted reality where he or she can do no wrong.

17. ‘HEAVEN’S REWARD’ FALLACY

In this pattern of thinking, a person may expect divine rewards for his or her sacrifices. People experiencing this distortion tend to put their interests and feelings aside in hopes that they will be rewarded for their selflessness later, but they may become bitter and angry if the reward is never presented.

18. FALLACY OF CHANGE

This distortion assumes that other people must change their behavior in order for us to be happy. This way of thinking is usually considered selfish because it insists, for example, that other people change their schedule to accommodate yours or that your partner shouldn’t wear his or her favorite t-shirt because you don’t like it.

19. FALLACY OF FAIRNESS

This fallacy assumes that things have to be measured based on fairness and equality, when in reality things often don’t always work that way. An example of the trap this type of thinking sets is when it justifies infidelity if a person’s partner has cheated.

20. CONTROL FALLACY

Someone who sees things as internally controlled may put himself or herself at fault for events that are truly out of the person’s control, such as another person’s happiness or behavior. A person who sees things as externally controlled might blame his or her boss for poor work performance.

HOW TO CHANGE THINKING PATTERNS AND COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS

For many, one or more of these cognitive distortions will look familiar. You may fall into one or more of these traps or know someone who does. The good news is that cognitive distortions don’t have to weigh you down like an anchor.

Thought patterns can be changed through a process referred to in cognitive therapy as cognitive restructuring. The idea behind it is that by adjusting our automatic thoughts, we are able to influence our emotions and behaviors. This is the basis of several popular forms of therapy, including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and rational emotive behavioral therapy (REBT).

If you feel that one or more of the above cognitive distortions is contributing to feelings of anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues, we encourage you to consider finding a qualified therapist you trust to work with you and help transform your negative thoughts and beliefs into empowering affirmations that inspire and uplift you.

References:

1. Beck, Aaron T. (1976). Cognitive therapies and emotional disorders. New York: New American Library.
2. Beck, Aaron T. (1972). Depression; Causes and Treatment. Philadelphia: University of Pennsylvania Press.
3. Tagg, John (1996). Cognitive Distortions. Retrieved from http://daphne.palomar.edu/jtagg/cds.htm#cogdis
   

© Copyright 2015 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved. Permission to publish granted by A good therapist, therapist in Olympia, Washington

How Anxiety Destroys Relationships (and How to Stop It)

Originally posted on GoodTherapy.org on June 22, 2015 • Contributed by Kristine Tye, MA, LMFT, Anxiety Topic Expert Contributor

There is an abundance of information about how anxiety impacts our health—mentally, emotionally, and physically. Have you considered the impact anxiety may have on the health of your relationship?

Anxiety can cause periods of panic, feelings of fear or overwhelm, and a general sense of unease and tension. It can take over your thoughts and bleed into many areas of your life.

If you are feeling a strain on your relationship, anxiety may be playing a role. Could your anxiety (or your partner’s) be putting your relationship at risk?

Here’s how and why anxiety destroys relationships, and what you can do to stop it.

1. ANXIETY BREAKS DOWN TRUST AND CONNECTION …

Anxiety causes fear or worry that can make you less aware of your true needs in a given moment. It can also make you less attuned to the needs of your partner. If you’re worried about what could be happening, it’s difficult to pay attention to what is happening. When you feel overwhelmed, your partner may feel as though you aren’t present.

… so train your brain to live in the moment. If you notice a fear or concern that causes your thoughts to stray from the facts or the present moment, pause and think about what you know (as opposed to what you don’t know). Calm down before you act. You can make purposeful steps to build trust in your partner. Share openly when you’re feeling worried, and consciously reach out to your partner (physically or verbally) when you might normally withdraw or attack in fear.

2. ANXIETY CRUSHES YOUR TRUE VOICE, CREATING PANIC OR PROCRASTINATION …

Someone who tends to be anxious may have trouble expressing his or her true feelings. It also may be difficult to keep reasonable boundaries by asking for the attention or space that is needed.

Since experiencing anxiety is uncomfortable, subconsciously you may try to postpone the experience of it. On the other hand, anxiety can cause you to believe that something must be talked about immediately, when in fact a short break may be beneficial.

If you don’t express what you truly feel or need, anxiety becomes stronger. Plus, your emotions may eventually spiral out of control if you keep them in. You may become overwhelmed and defensive.

… so acknowledge your feelings sooner rather than later. A feeling or concern doesn’t have to be a disaster in order for it to be addressed. Approach your partner with kindness, so that you’re neither procrastinating nor panicking. Also, find time on your own to unpack some of the thoughts or fears circulating in your mind; they are draining your time and energy.

3. ANXIETY CAUSES YOU TO BEHAVE SELFISHLY …

Because anxiety is an overactive fear response, someone experiencing it may at times focus too much on his or her own concerns or problems.

Your worries and fears may be putting unnecessary pressure on your relationship. You may feel like you need to worry in order to protect yourself in your relationship, but it might be keeping you from being compassionate and vulnerable with your partner.

If your partner experiences anxiety, you may build up resentment and react in selfish ways as well. The attitudes and perspectives that we have are contagious. Keeping your stress levels under control is especially hard when your partner is feeling anxious, upset, or defensive.

… so attend to your needs, not your fears. When you notice yourself becoming fearful or defensive, take a moment to consider the compassion that you have for yourself and your partner. Clearly ask for the support you need to feel loved and understood. Apologize for letting anxiety make you self-absorbed.

4. ANXIETY IS THE OPPOSITE OF ACCEPTANCE …

A healthy form of worry will tell you “something isn’t right”; it comes via that quick pull at your heart or that tight feeling in your stomach. This signal helps you act, such as when you speak up for someone who is being treated poorly.

Unhealthy levels of anxiety make you feel as though an emotional “rock” is in your stomach almost all the time. Anxiety causes you to reject things that are not dangerous and avoid things that might benefit you. It also can stop you from taking healthy action to change things in your life that are hurting you because it makes you feel hopeless or stuck.

… so practice being uncomfortable. You don’t need to either ignore or obsess over an uncomfortable thought. Take constructive action if you can. Sometimes your partner just needs you to be present with his or her feelings, and sometimes you need to offer that same gift to yourself. You can show your presence to your partner with soft eyes or a soft touch, and be present for yourself with a calming breath.

5. ANXIETY ROBS YOU OF JOY …

Experiencing joy requires a sense of safety or freedom. Anxiety makes us feel either fearful or limited. Also, a brain and body trained to stress may have a much harder time enjoying sex and intimacy. Negative thoughts and fears impact a person’s ability to be present within a relationship, potentially sucking the joy out of a moment.

… so don’t take yourself too seriously. You can use your sense of humor to overcome anxiety. Remember to laugh and play with your partner. Joy physically heals and comforts your brain in ways that are vital for a healthy relationship.

AS ANXIETY WEAKENS, YOUR RELATIONSHIP STRENGTHENS

Building trust within your relationship may reduce the power of anxiety. By understanding how anxiety impacts your relationships, you can create positive change within a relationship dynamic.

A therapist who specializes in anxiety treatment can help you further understand anxiety and help you stop harming yourself and your relationship.

© Copyright 2015 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved. Permission to publish granted by Kristine Tye, MA, LMFT, therapist in Sherman Oaks, California

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What Is Your Therapist Listening For?

Originally posted on GoodTherapy.org on June 5, 2018 • By Alena Gerst, LCSW, RYT, GoodTherapy.org Topic Expert

Advice is cheap.

Advice puts the onus on the listener and not the speaker.

Advice is often a quick fix—a mere Band-Aid on a wound that needs more persistent care.

I can usually detect someone’s frustration when, as their therapist, I pointedly do not offer advice. One of the skills therapists learn early in their training is one of the hardest, for both the therapist and the person in therapy sitting in silence. But drawing out more information from people is a psychotherapist’s most useful tool. After all, your therapist is a trained listener, not advice-giver.

That does not mean your therapist is merely looking at you and listening while you talk. Any skilled therapist will be listening acutely for specific signals, which they then use to guide the direction of the conversation over time.

In general, your therapist is listening for three things:

1. WHAT YOU REALLY WANT

Nobody knows you better than you. That is why advice so often fails to help you move in the direction you want to go. Ultimately, you have the answers to your questions, though they may be buried under the expectations, hopes, and dreams of others.

It is actually pretty rare that people ask us what we really, truly want. We spend so much of our energy and efforts trying to meet the needs and desires of others. This is true for concerns large and small. It has to do with how we spend our weekends, what we eat for dinner, the career paths we choose, whom we marry and when, whether or not we have children.

In a variety of ways, your therapist is asking you, “What do you really want?”

Answering that question can bring about changes you may never have expected—some joyful, some scary. But in the end, the answer comes from you and nobody else. The essence of your answers are what will guide you closer to the life you want.

2. CHANGE TALK

Speaking of changes, I am rarely surprised when I hear someone hint at something in their lives they wish would change. When I reflect that desire back to them, people often respond as if it is the first time they had thought about it.

Your therapist is listening for your change talk. It usually starts with a tentative, “Maybe I could …” or “I wonder what would happen if …” or “I’ve always thought it would be interesting to …”

When I dive deeper upon hearing something like that, usually those sorts of statements are brushed off as a pipe dream. Your therapist intervening to examine change-talk statements may require you to face some of your deepest fears. This could be a fear of failure, fear that it is too late to try something new, fear that you are lacking in the talent, charm, or financial means necessary to follow this line of thinking. The reasons I hear why people cannot take even the smallest steps toward their dreams are usually more creative, varied, and unpredictable than I could imagine.

That is the point of intervention for you and your therapist. Change talk is where the work of therapy begins.

3. YOUR SELF-REGARD

Many people are shocked when they finally recognize how hard they are on themselves. Over time, we develop core negative beliefs about ourselves which we mistakenly believe to be the truth.

Your therapist is listening for those types of statements. Don’t be surprised if your therapist picks up on a core negative belief about yourself and challenges it. Such beliefs, that we are not “enough” in some way, seep into our subconscious so much that we do not even realize how critically we speak to ourselves.

Confronting those beliefs are some of the most demanding aspects of therapy. But it is possible, even likely, that if you think you are not enough, your therapist does not think of you the way you do, and they will reflect that belief to help you develop a more positive (and realistic) self-regard.

So while your therapist may guide your conversation in certain directions, it is not to offer you advice. It is so you can both learn more about what you truly want. And, eventually, so you can both learn what steps you think are most appropriate to take.

Shall we get started?

© Copyright 2018 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved. Permission to publish granted by Alena Gerst, LCSW, RYT, therapist in New York City, New York

Making Sense of Sensitivity: How to Help Your Anxious Child

These days, most of us live with some degree of stress. For kids, between their homework, friends, after-school activities, sports, and worries about getting into college, it’s a whole new era of anxiety. It’s no wonder, then, that the National Institute of Mental Health states that the prevalence of diagnosed anxiety disorders among 13- to 18-year-olds is 25.1%.

If you’re a parent living with an anxious child, you know how tiring and frustrating it can be—for both of you. It’s not easy to live with the kid who’s so stressed out by homework assignments that he ends up throwing the book against the wall, or tearing the papers in frustration, or working until midnight to get it perfect. Or the teen who gets a migraine every time she has to go to school or start a new activity. With a little insight into how they feel, why they act the way they do, and what we can do to help, the job of parenting anxious kids gets a little easier.

How They Feel

Anxiety doesn’t always show up as worry. Sometimes it looks like anger, irritability, sadness, or fear. After a full day at school worrying and obsessing, kids often come home exhausted—and immediately act out.

Imagine spending an entire day in fight-or-flight mode. That’s when the brain perceives a danger and thus produces adrenaline and stress hormones to prepare for a quick getaway, like a caveman running from a tiger. This causes physical sensations such as dizziness, faster heartbeat, rapid breathing, and sweaty palms. In this state, it’s tough to think clearly or make good, informed decisions. Even the most mature of us might lash out after all that.

Then again, sometimes these struggling kids look like stereotypical “normal” kids—at least at school, where they may crave the approval of the teachers. Keeping very contained gives them a sense of control over their environment, helping to minimize the risk of what they see as danger. But when they come home, everything changes. In the safety of their own room, they might have panic attacks, refuse to follow rules, or get violent.

What This Is NOT

If you lived with this level of stress every day, you’d probably come home and explode, too—and maybe you do. Kids tend to store up their stress and take it out on those they can trust: their parents and family members. Sometimes your home might feel like a battlefield.

What’s important to know is that this is not manipulation.  Your child doesn’t want to be this way. It’s easy to think that he or she is acting out in order to get attention, or that if the child were less spoiled, less spiteful, or less rebellious, he or she would stop being “bratty.” But in reality, no one, especially a sensitive kid, would choose to constantly be in trouble.

Anxious children may lose it for a handful of reasons:

• Lack of self-control
• Storing up their frustration until it explodes
• Guilt
• Low self-esteem
• Unconsciously testing parents
  

How We Can Help

Anxious children generally lack two vital skills for reacting with calm and rationality. The first is regulation, or the ability to calm oneself. The second is self-soothing tools, or alternatives to turn to when their emotional temperature spikes.

The first way parents can help kids regulate is by modeling regulation. The more calm you are, the more they’ll learn from that ability. Research shows that humans’ heart rates attune with the people that they feel close to. So if someone holds us in a loving way, our heartbeats will often increase or decrease to match theirs.

Therefore, one way to help them relax is to reverse-match our activity to theirs. In other words, as they go up, we go down. If their bodies become jerky or uncontrolled, we keep our movements fluid and slow. As their volumes raise, we modulate our voices even more. And if they become angry or even nasty, we remain loving and firm.

Self-soothing tools fall into two main catagories: physical and mental. (These tools require some practice, and only their basics are described here.) Physical tools include breathing and stretching. Check out Dawn Huebner’s book, What to Do When You Worry Too Much, for great examples of how to stretch. Breathing exercises and body movement exercises help reset the inner thermostat. Exercise also helps to calm the body, so throwing a ball, jumping on a trampoline, or dancing around the living room are great ideas for breaks.

Mental self-soothing is achieved by thinking calming thoughts. This can be done with words, like a mantra that replaces the anxious thought. For instance, when a child says, “I can’t do it,” or, “I always screw up,” you can help him or her practice saying, “I just need to try my best.” Ask the child to come up with some alternate statements that make him or her feel better, and practice together.

In addition to words, images can also be self-soothing. Where is your child’s favorite place? Could he or she create an imaginary haven? When feeling stressed, have your child conjure up this “safe space” in his or her mind, whether it’s a sandy beach, flower garden, or private room. Breathing slowly and thinking about a quiet and peaceful place calms the body and soothes the mind.

The Long-Term Upside

These are sensitive kids; that’s why they feel things so deeply. So it’s helpful to remember the flipside of that sensitivity. These are children who tend to be insightful, empathetic, tuned in, passionate, dramatic, and thoughtful. They often thrive in creative pursuits and go on to amazing careers in helping professions. The traits that are so challenging to them now will serve them well as adults. For now, the best we can do is teach them to channel their sensitivity into self-care.

Reference:

Any anxiety disorder among children. (2015). National Institute of Mental Health. Retrieved from http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/prevalence/any-anxiety-disorder-among-children.shtml

© Copyright 2015 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved.

Why Mindfulness Alone Isn’t Enough for Growth

As we develop in the practice of mindfulness, our capacity to be with our experience increases, and our relationship with ourselves softens and becomes sweeter. Being with our experience in a direct way—with a nonjudgmental attitude of curiosity—is at the core of mindfulness practice.

While mindfulness is important and necessary for self-development, is it enough if we want to deepen our inner journey? Before I answer that question, it is important to talk a bit about our sense of self and how it develops.

Self-Perception Has Its Limits

Put simply, our sense of self is largely developed through our interaction with our parents and our environment. Depending on the type of parenting and the level of safety and input we got during infancy, childhood, and adolescence, the way we perceive the world, orient to it, and experience ourselves in it becomes solidified (and, to some extent, rigid).

One way of measuring emotional health is by how flexible that sense of self is. Generally speaking, the input we received while growing up develops into filters and ideas about the world and ourselves that limit our perception of reality. When we do inner work, one of the aims is to understand, see through, and dissolve these filters and ideas we have about ourselves.

Some of these ideas, though, are so deeply ingrained in our psyches that we can’t conceive of experience without them; we come to believe that our filters are simply who we are. In order to understand and eventually dissolve the ones that no longer serve us, we need to experience their energy directly, without necessarily applying a conceptual understanding, yet (somewhat paradoxically) also have an understanding of how they developed.

Growth Requires More Than Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a great tool we can use to enter the experiential portion of the equation, for it will help us stay present and in direct contact with our experience. Mindfulness can also serve in the conceptual understanding by helping us stay focused and not get lost in the many thought patterns that our minds are constantly producing.

But if we practice mindfulness alone, seeing and dissolving these internal patterns is extremely difficult. Again, these patterns are so ingrained in us that we believe they’re who we are, and the possibility of us being something else is terrifying for our usual sense of self. In order to work with them, there needs to be some kind of friction that will help us see them clearly. On top of that, this friction must be contained in a deep sense of safety, so that we are able to tolerate the uncomfortable sensations and emotions the friction produces.

This friction can only come about in relationship. Because our patterns originated in relationship, they can be transformed in relationship. This is where psychotherapy and having others reflect to us our patterns are essential in the process of self-discovery.

Having an external, empathic person validating and observing our experience gives us the advantage of perspective, and if we are open and ready for it, this person can also help us see through our beliefs and filters about the world, other people, and ourselves. A good therapist can begin to point out these patterns and reframe them as our relationship to them.

Of course, a therapist isn’t the only person who can co-create this type of relationship. Any relationship will surface our patterns. Romantic relationships will expose them in the deepest way. However, a therapist—at least, a therapist trained to see unconscious, transference, and countertransference —specifically focuses on seeing our patterns, and provides a valuable holding environment to process and more deeply understand them.

Both Mindfulness and Relationship Are Essential

In my own process, I have benefited from mindfulness as well as continuous relationships with others. I could say that all of my relationships have served as mirrors and have helped me see my unconscious patterns, but I have to say that the most significant relationships have been my more lasting, committed ones. These include my past therapists, spiritual teachers, family of origin, deeper friendships, and romantic relationships. All helped me profoundly to see different aspects of my own patterns. In my relationship with my spouse, some of my deeper defenses began to arise.

With their help—and my own capacity, developed through mindfulness—I have been able to tolerate the experience of defenses dissolving to access the younger, more hidden parts of myself. Some of these parts are so deep within, and so afraid to relate, that it has taken years of continuous work for them to come to the surface. This can be a scary, even terrifying, process. Again, mindfulness alone will not suffice in this endeavor.

Frankly speaking, the fear is fear of dying. In a way, this is accurate; who I think I am is literally dying. However, when I am able to tolerate the experience, something else begins to arise and support me. As my attention stays with what’s happening, I am able to recognize that a subtler, and profound, presence is closer to who I am than my historical sense of self.

The practical implications of this discovery, and the integrations of it in my daily life, are very clear. For example, relationships have become more fulfilling; I’ve begun to have more access to expansive states of being; and I am able to more quickly recognize when I get caught up in old patterns. This is not a fixed, one-time achievement; it is an ongoing process of opening and dissolving ever-deeper structures.

To sum up, mindfulness is a great tool that will support our process of discovery at any stage; however, if we don’t also address our relational dynamics and personality patterns, our process will not deepen much. And in order to address these issues, we need others.

© Copyright 2015 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved. Permission to publish granted by Manuel A. Manotas, PsyD, therapist in San Francisco, California.